The Scout Law as learned by Sakvithi Ranasinghe when he was a boy!

A Scout is…

Trustworthy: His honour is to be trusted. He learns to lie and cheat only in emergencies. Like when he takes an examination, goes into business or fills out his income tax.

Loyal: He learns that in the business world, he must be loyal to his employer’s customers. And when he goes into business for himself, he maintains this loyalty by taking those customers away from his old employer and making them his customers.

Helpful: He does a good turn everyday to anyone who can be of use to him. Except in later life, when he helps his friends avoid the misery and expense of marriage by stealing their fiancées from them immediately prior to the weddings.

Friendly: He never says cold, formal things like, “Sorry to double-cross you like this, Mr.Aariyadasa.” He always says warm, friendly things like, “Sorry to double-cross you like this, Edwin.”

Courteous: He is especially polite to women and old people. If a woman or an old person is standing in a bus while he is sitting, he will help make the trip a little easier for them by holding his paper up higher so they can read the back of it.

Kind: He will not hurt any living creature needlessly. The only reason he is taught to hurt some living creature is because, to be successful in business, there is a need for it.

Obedient: He obeys his parents not just a week before Christmas, when most boys are obedient, but at other times as well, like a week before his birthday.

Cheerful: He smiles all the time. H e follows orders promptly and cheerfully. He is always in good spirits, because he drinks half a bottle of Vodka a day.

Thrifty: He will carefully pick a parking meter that has plenty of time to go before reaching a violation.

Brave: When things are tough, when the cops are on his trail, and the people he swindled are baying for his blood, he still has the courage to cry, “Boodhoo Ammay!” even when he knows people will laugh at him!