December 20, 2008

10 Commandments for Barrack O'Bummer also known as "Things thou shall not CHANGE!"

1. Thou shall not paint the “White House” BLACK!

2. Thou shall not order piano manufactures to paint the white piano keys black!

3. Thou shall not change or prohibit words starting with ‘black,’ like black eye, blackhead, black hole, black jack, blacklist, black market, black sheep, blackguard or blackmail!

4. Thou shall honour thy father and mother and all the non-black voters who voted you President!

5. Thou shall not appoint the Rev. Jeremiah Wright, Secretary of State or Louis Farrakhan Commander of the US Armed Forces!

6. Thou shall not address thy wife Michelle as “First Momma” or “First Bitch” but as “First Lady” in the time honoured tradition!

7. Thou shall not change the slogan “In God We Trust!” on dollar bills to read “In O’Bummer We Trust!”

8. Thou shall not have talks with Iran, Cuba or North Korea without pre-conditions!
e.g. (Beer and Bourbon during morning discussions on “Weapons of Mass Destruction,” Cuban cigars and brandy after lunch and a few well rolled joints and some Iranian Hashish during discussions after lunch!)

9. Thou shall not smoke grass or snort coke in the “White House!” (outside the White House is ok though!)

10. Thou shall build a temple to venerate the Goddess “Oprah Winfrey” who helped nullify the “Bradley Effect” with the “Oprah Effect!”

These 10 Commandments I have given thee. Follow them well or be ready to be a one term President if you don’t! Now go forth and multiply or do whatever it is you US Presidents do!
The Lord has spoken!

Barrack O'Bummer: The first half black/half white President of USA

Barrack O’Bummer (sounds Irish doesn’t it?) was elected the 44th President of the United States of America by the electoral college on November 5th 2008. People the world over are calling Barrack O’Bummer the 1st Black President of the USA!

Are these people blind or crazy or both? Barrack O’Bummer’s mother is white and his father (a Kenyan) is black! A child gets half his chromosomes from his mother and the other half from his father! In my book that makes Barrack O’Bummer the first half black/half white President of the USA!

For those people around the world who hate America and have branded it a racist country, the election results prove that the vast majority of Americans are not racist! The only way Barrack O’Bummer could have won was with a majority of the white votes. The Black and Hispanic votes would not have been enough to win him the Presidency. The white voters of America proved the world wrong, and the “Bradley Effect” did not come into play after all!

For those of you who do not know what the Bradley effect is:

(The Bradley effect, less commonly called the Wilder effect, is a theory proposed to explain observed discrepancies between voter opinion polls and election outcomes in some US government elections where a white candidate and a non-white candidate run against each other. Instead of ascribing the results to flawed methodology on the part of the pollster, the theory proposes that some voters tend to tell pollsters that they are undecided or likely to vote for a black candidate, and yet, on election day, vote for his white opponent. It was named after Tom Bradley, an African-American who lost the 1982 California governor’s race despite being ahead in voter polls going into the elections.)

The 64 million dollar question that has been doing the rounds since Barrack O’Bummer’s victory is, “Will Barrack O’Bummer paint the White House, Black, and rename it the Black House?” Well the answer to that is, as Barrack O’Bummer is half black/half white, he will probably paint one half of the “White House” black and keep the other half white, and rename it the “Half Black Half White House!”

The other question doing the rounds is, “Will Barrack O’Bummer bring a law that will force piano manufactures to paint all the white keys on pianos black?” The logical answer to that is, What part of Barrack O’Bummer brain is his most dominant side?

His black side or his white side? If it is his white side, he will leave the pianos as they are now with all white keys, and black keys for the sharps and flats! But if his dominant side is his back side, oops sorry, I meant black side, then he would probably have all the white keys painted black and the black sharps and flat keys painted white!

Lets keep our fingers crossed! Who knows what is going on in his half white/half black brain? I wonder which side of his brain is the more dominant? The left side or the right side? The black side or the white side? Is the black side the right side and the white side left or vice versa? Hmmm...another 64 million dollar question!

Breaking News just in: All Black Women in the USA are shaving their pubic hair off in support of Barrack O’Bummer’s election as President! Their message to the world is, “READ OUR LIPS! NO MORE BUSH!”

I’m fed up to the eyeballs with the love fest that the media has been having with Barrack O’Bummer for the last 20 or so months. In all these many months, Barrack O’Bummer has been talking the talk from north to south and east to west. Now that he is President, its time that he starts walking the talk! The time for pretty speeches is over, and the hard work begins now!
Lets see if Barrack O’Bummer has got what it takes or he falls flat on his face!

Only time will tell. Till then, “God Bless Barrack O’Bummer and the Democrats!” And God Damn John McCain, Sarah Palin, Fox News and the Republican and Independent voters!”