August 7, 2008
The lighter side of the 15th Deiyo SAARC kee Conference
The 15th Deiyo SAARC kee Conference a.k.a. the ‘Beggars Conference’ was held in the ‘Autocratic Totalitarian Dictatorship of Paradise Lost’ recently. The Conference was attended by leaders from 8 regional dictatorships of South East Antarctica.
They were: President Chinthana Paksharaja of the host country, ‘Paradise Lost’. Prime Minister Mannamaala Sing from ‘Indiana Jones Land’. Prime Minister Goo Laanee from ‘Puck is Land’. An unknown Bum from ‘Bum of a Desh’. President Abdul Baboon from ‘Maalu Islands’. President Haramaanis Karzai from ‘Talaiban Land’. Prime Minister Jigi Jigi Jigme from ‘Boo Tang’, and Prime Minister Gamaraala Koirala from ‘No Paul’.
President Chinthana Paksharaja of ‘Paradise Lost’ proposed that the 8 Deiyo SAARC kee Dictatorships should join hands, arms, legs ect. to defeat Tourism! He stated that ever since the ‘Sudda Buggers’ had heard about the beautiful beaches in the region, they had descended in droves and become the scourge of the South East Antarctic countries! A resolution was passed that every means at their disposal should be used to combat Tourism! It was decided that as each countries own indigenous terrorist groups should be utilized to combat Tourism! The ‘Prevention of Tourism Act’ (PTA) was approved unanimously, giving wide ranging powers to the terrorists!
“Restoring Terrorism through the defeat of Tourism should be the goal of all our dictatorships stated President Chinthana Paksharaja, and cautioned that “the deadliest Tourists were the ‘Seaside Bummers’, who flaunted their ‘claymore boobs’ and ‘parcel bums’ on beaches throughout the region!” President Chinthana Paksharaja also mentioned with pride, Chief Minister Pulliman a.k.a. ‘Jelly Bum’ a former child prostitute who gave up Tourism to embrace Terrorism.
The Conference ended after the 8 leaders agreed to “Kill all Tourists and let the Tourist Board sort them out!” President Chinthana Paksharaja
then invited the foreign delegates for a Kurrakan and Baabath feed at the five and a half star Tourist Board approved ‘Matara Bath Kade’. The President desisted from eating any baabath and only dipped into the baabath gravy as he was a ‘born again’ vegetarian!
After a round of kola kenda laced with some arrack, Prime Minister Mannamaala Sing rolled a few joints of the finest ‘Kerala Ganja’, and passed them around after which the leaders decided to call it a day. The bill was paid by Central Bank Governor, Ajith Nivatta Kabba from a loan taken from the World Bank. It was decided to hold next years Deiyo SAARC kee Conference a.k.a. the ‘Beggars Conference’ in the Maalu Islands! President Abdul Baboon promised all the delegates a sumptuous Dry Fish feed when they arrived next year. Prime Minister Mannamaala Sing said he would supply more Kerala Ganja to jazz up the Conference! Maalu Islands here we come! Be there or be square!
The Moral of the story: You are never too old to sit around looking like idiots!