If Famous Movies were remade in Sri Lanka…

War & Peace would become, War is Election Victories.

Harry Potter & the Half Blood Prince would become, Harry Potter & the Blood Thirsty Wannabe KING.

The Passion of Christ would become, The War Passion of Mahinda.

Star Wars would become, Humanitarian Wars.

The Last of the Mohicans would become, The Last of the Tigers.

Lord of the Rings would become, Lord of the GREENS (Starring Ranil Wickramasinghe)

Slum Dog Millionaire would become, Four War Lord Millionaire Brothers.

Doctor Zhivago would become, Doctor Mervin Silva.

Cry Freedom would become, Cry Human Rights Abuses.

Star Wars – Return of the Jedi would become, Humanitarian Wars – Return of the Praba.

Mission Impossible would become, Free & Fair Elections is a Mission Impossible.

The Good, Bad & the Ugly would become, Ranil, Gotabaya & Bandula Gunewardene.

Kill Bill would become, Kill Lasantha.

Robin Hood & his Merry Men would become, Prabahakaran & his Suicidal Men.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse would become, The Four Brothers of the Family Dictatorship.

Anthony & Cleopatra would become, Karuna & Pillayan.

Catch Me If You Can would become, Catch Lasantha’s Killers If You Can.

Treasure Island would become, IDIOT ISLAND.

Enter the Dragon would become, Enter the No Fire Zone.

Austin Powers ‘Goldmember’ would become, Mervin Silva ‘Member of Parliament.

David Copperfield would become, David Milliband.

The Three Musketeers would become, The Four Rajapaksas.

Close Encounters of the Third Kind would become, Ceasefire for the Last Time.

Gangs of New York would become, White Van Gangs of Colombo.

The Greatest Story Ever Told would become, The Tallest Stories Ever Told. (Starring Keheliya Rambukwella & Brigadier Udaya Nanayakara.

Lawrence of Arabia would become, Gaddafi of Libya.

The Matrix would become, The Politricksters.

Raging Bull would become, Raging BULLY. (Starring Mervin Silva)

The Mummy would become, The DUMMY. (Starring R.Duminda Silva)

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest would become, One Dropped Cluster Bombs on the NO FIRE ZONE.

No Retreat, No Surrender would become, No Ceasefire, No Devolution of Power.

The Great Train Robbery would become, The Great Helping Hambanthota Tsunami Aid Robbery.

Tarzan of the Apes would become, Mahinda of the Sinhala Buddhists.

The Great Escape would become, The Great Escape of Praba.

Ocean’s Eleven would become, Mahinda’s Hundred an Eleven (Cabinet Ministers).

The Killing Fields would become, The Killing Fields of the NO FIRE ZONE.

Rasputin the Mad Monk would become, Jathika Hela Urumaya & its Racist Monks.

The Guns of Navarone would become, The Guns of Vellamoolyvaikal.

Dirty Harry would become, Dirty Harry Jayawardene.

The Creature From the Black Lagoon would become, The Creature From the Diyawanna Oya. (Starring Mervin Silva)

A Fist Full of Dollars would become, A Fist Full of IMF Dollars.

Invasion of the Body Snatchers would become, Invasion of the International Conspirators.

The Prisoner of Zenda would become, The Prisoners’ of the Vanni Concentration Camps.

Conan the Barbarian would become, Kohona the Humanitarian.

Born Free would become, Born in a Vanni Concentration Camp.

Missing in Action would become, Zero Casualties.

Kill Bill 2 would become, Kill Journalists.

ET would become, KP (Kevin Petersen).